Feb. 02, 2010 Justin Bieber is a Serial Killer
by Luke Bainbridge

If you have been listening to the radio of late then you have no doubt heard of the diabolical new teen sensation Justin Bieber. Mr. Bieber has taken the world by storm with his hit singles “One Time” and “One Less Lonely Girl”, but what truly lurks beneath the sugary-sweet surface of this pop-sensation? The answer: a sociopathic serial killer. What follows is an exhaustive analysis of the lyrics of one of Mr. Bieber’s hit songs (“One Less Lonely Girl”), and how these lyrics constitute a confession of the most grotesque of crimes perpetrated by Mr. Bieber. Join me now as we delve into the twisted mind of a lonely, obsessive mass-murderer.



The song begins innocently enough with Bieber chanting about how there will be “one less lonely girl”. We are taken to believe this means he will date said girl and make her happy, thereby eliminating her aforementioned loneliness. This all seems pretty normal for a fifteen year-old boy, however Mr. Bieber chooses to end his opening lines with a little laugh, what is so funny Mr. Bieber?



Here, like Keanu Reeves in The Watcher before him, Bieber is profiling his victim, instinctively picking out a weak and vulnerable “lonely girl”. Clearly he is attempting to appeal to this poor girl’s better nature, and how could she possibly refute such a sweet and innocent boys casual observations about her prior relationships, but where is this knowledge coming from?



Here young Justin proceeds off the deep end in his ramblings, for the first time confirming that he has become obsessed with his new victim. How many stalkers justify their actions by asserting that “all [they] see is you”? How many sociopaths creep around an ex-girlfriends window at night for this reason? How can you possibly justify yourself now Mr. Bieber? Justin finishes this refrain with the chilling sentiment “I’m coming for you”; a phrase most often reserved for one’s mortal enemies.



Here the chorus takes us deep into the psychosis that is Justin Bieber. Mr. Bieber seems to be struggling with his emotions at the start (“Noo No”), but quickly switches gears back into obsession before asserting that not only is he coming for you, but there will be one less lonely girl. Based on Mr. Bieber’s rampant obsession we can only assume that he means to kill this lonely girl, a theory reinforced by the lines that follow. Justin asserts that he will “show you what you’re worth”, clearly meaning he intends to show her she is worthless by murdering her. Given this context “if you let me inside your world” comes off as more of a threat than anything else.

What follows is mostly more derivative rambling about Justin’s obsession with this lonely girl and how he intends to end her; I will proceed to highlight the most damning evidence only.



Here we finally have a full-on admission of guilt by Bieber. Justin wants his prey to be “free to fall”, but fall where? Why in love with Bieber of course. Realizing that he has fooled his (now smitten) prey he moves in for the kill. He “take[s] her”, leaving the “world with one less lonely girl”, thereby fulfilling some sick fantasy that he is destined to play out again and again because of some shortcoming in himself he cannot face.

Justin Bieber is a menace and he must be stopped. The world is filled with these so-called lonely girls and Bieber will not stop until he has “taken” each and every one of them, slowly but surely adding them to his sick blood slide collection and sinking deeper into psychosis and depression. Join me in asking your local justice to detain and prosecute Mr. Bieber before he can kill again, and remember if you’re a lonely girl, he may be coming for you; beware.

Feb. 02, 2010 by Andrew

It's always the one you least expect.....

Feb. 02, 2010 by midnightLuke

Well I sorta expected Justin Bieber to be a serial killer, but I guess I just have a nose for those sorts of things.

Feb. 02, 2010 by Leanna

Oh the Bieber..Once seen as an innocent, pre-teen craze, now the truth is revealed!